


Salty

by Alexizzy



Category: Pitch Perfect (Movies)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-26
Updated: 2019-06-27
Packaged: 2020-05-20 01:20:21
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 8,713
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19367311
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Alexizzy/pseuds/Alexizzy
Summary: AU Beca’s a nurse secretly in love with her best friend.I suck at summaries.It’s angsty with a Bechloe ending...most likely a smutty ending.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So I have this all written (for the most part), so should be posting it all relatively quickly. 
> 
> If ya hate it, cool. If you think it’s sorta okay, cool. 
> 
> Thanks for reading :)

It was probably your eyes that I fell in love with first. So vibrant and expressive. They were the first thing that made me think there may be hope. Hope that this thing between us is more than just my stupid daydream. 

Second was probably your laugh. You’re so self conscious and try to hide it because it’s “dorky.” To be completely honest, it’s totally dorky, but that’s what I love about it. It’s joyful and has a way of pulling others in. It’s so uniquely you. 

Third was your compassion and love for others. The more I got to know you, the more I fell for your heart. You’re beautiful yes, but god your soul is even more brilliant. 

The list could go on, but I need to stop myself. 

You’re not mine. 

You never will be. 

You’re currently kissing someone else. He asked you to be his for life, and you said yes, through teary eyes, eyes that I’ve loved since we first met. With an awkward snort laugh and a breathtaking smile you told him yes, one hundred times yes, then your eyes met mine and ripped my heart out completely. 

I sipped on my drink as you two kissed and everyone cheered.

I needed to be more drunk for this. Drunk enough that I’ve numbed my bleeding heart, but not enough that I confess my world to you and ruin everything. 

You break from your kiss with him, pulling back to admire your ring, a joyful glint in your eyes. You began searching the crowd. My guess, looking for me. I can’t take it anymore and slip away, into the crowd, out of sight, and hopefully not missed. I don’t want you to miss me. Enjoy your moment. Enjoy it with those who are happy for you, because I can’t fake that. 

I find my coat and slip it on, quickly making my way to the front door. 

“Beca!” A hand snags my arm and stops me from stepping out. 

My stomach drops. It’s your hurt voice. I can tell just by the tone of it you’re confused. You’re hurt by my actions and I try to muster all of my strength to slap on a happy smile for you, but I can’t. 

I turn, my face slightly surprised that you caught me so quickly. 

Of course you did. I’m your best friend. You would want to celebrate this moment with me. 

“Are...are you leaving so soon?” You barely choke it out and my stomach drops. I can hear the pain in your voice and want to die for having caused that on your special night. 

“Honey, I’m so sorry, I’m on call tomorrow and should have left two hours ago.” The excuse is valid, but we both know it’s lame as the words leave my lips. 

Your brows furrow. You can read me like a book. 

“Becs...what’s wrong?”

“Nothing Beale.” I plaster on my fake smile. The one that wins over all the stupid doctors at work. The one that convinces them that the orders I’m asking for were actually their idea. “Shit. I’m sorry, I’m a terrible friend.” I switch to my sheepish apologetic smile. “God I’m a dick...I didn’t even say congrats.” I watch your expression falter, you’re not sure you believe me yet. “Congratulations Chloe, I’m so happy you’re happy.” I beam at you while my heart shatters. It was the truth, but I desperately needed to end this conversation before I cracked in front of you. 

“Thanks Beca.” Your smile looks forced and I panic. 

How do I fix this?

I step in and pull you into a hug. 

“You’re so perfect Chlo...you deserve the world.”

I try to pull back but you don’t let me. You squeeze me tighter and bury your face into my neck. 

“You’re my world.” You whisper. 

My chest tightens and I feel the floodgates begin to crack. 

I can’t cry in front of you. 

“You’re my world.” I whisper back. 

You straighten up, your arms still holding me close, a determined look in your eye. 

“Do you mean that Beca?” Your voice is quiet, somewhat hoarse. 

“Of course.” I smile back at you. 

I’ll always mean it. 

Your eyes drop to my lips and my breath catches as you began to lean in. 

Was this really happening?

Are you going to kiss me?

“Chloe! Babe! There you are!”

Whatever was maybe going to happen was ruined. Ruined by the very reason it shouldn’t happen. 

There’s no way that’s what was going to happen. 

Right?

“Oh hey Beca!” Chicago’s boyish grin flashes at me. 

“Hey dude. Congrats! So happy for you both!” I lie beautifully. 

“Thanks!” He beams down at me, then turns his attention to you. “Babe, I have another surprise for you.” He says, reaching forward and taking your hand. “Coming Beca?”

“No, I’m on call for work tomorrow...gotta get some sleep.”

“Cool, glad you could be here for this!” He yells, dragging you behind him. Your eyes catch mine before you hit the crowd of people again. 

They looked so torn, lost even. Or maybe that was just my emotions projecting onto everything.

I head out into the cool summer air. 

Life moves on. It always does. I could too. 

I can let you go.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> More angst...but like it’s longer and is story building so please don’t hate me

“work work work work work work”

I immediately regretted selecting the ringtone “Work” for when my work calls. 

“Rihanna is not a good wake up.” I mumble, rolling over and giving my best cheery “hello” into my phone. 

“Morning Beca, this is your confirmation call. We need you in ICU.”

“I’ll be there.” I hang up before the nursing supervisor could say anything else.

“5am on the dot.” I groan, rolling over after setting my alarm for 6am. 

It was the perfect hour “nap”. I woke and rushed to get ready. The rush helped distract me from the previous nights events. 

I paused, fixing my mascara, a random memory flashing to mind.

******  
“Your eyes are so beautiful.” Chloe whispered, scooting closer to me in bed. 

She stopped by to wake me up and make me go to yoga with her. Why did I give her a spare key?

Her hot breath tickled my cheek as I looked away embarrassed. “You’re so cute when you’re embarrassed.” She whisper smirked at me, causing my cheeks to heat up worse. She sat up slightly, propping herself up on her elbow so she could look at me better. “Do you have any idea how beautiful you are?” 

I looked back at her, slightly confused. 

I tried to speak but whatever I was gonna say came out like gibberish when my eyes met hers. 

“What?” She giggled, reaching over to brush hair off my face. 

“I can’t think straight when you’re this close to me.” My eyes grew huge as I realized what I said and my mouth quickly tried to make up for it. “I just mean...Chloe do you have any idea what you look like?” Her smirk faltered and I tried to quickly redeem myself. “You’re gorgeous...it’s not even fair how beautiful you are...your eyes kinda distract me from life...” I ended, turning an even brighter shade of red. 

I wasn’t making this better. 

“Do you mean that Becs?” She asked me somewhat breathlessly. 

I was too distracted by her eyes again to answer. There were flecks I hadn’t memorized yet. 

“I feel the same way about you...” she smiled shyly at me.   
******

 

My phone dinged. It was my reminder that I needed to leave in five minutes. I snapped back to finishing my mascara. 

“You definitely don’t feel the same way about me...” I whisper, double checking that I used the waterproof one today. One could never be too careful. 

•••

I arrived on the unit just in time to clock in and see my assignment. 

“Are you a glutton for punishment?” A familiar voice whispered in my ear. 

“Clearly. I signed up knowing full well you worked today.” I turned, flashing Stacie my cocky smirk. 

She leaned over me to look at her assignment. 

“Yay! Our patients are right next to each other!”

This was what I needed today. A day, doing what I love, with the people I love, Chloe would not bring me down. 

I felt my Apple Watch buzz and glanced down. 

Chloe: “saw you drive off this morning, hope we didn’t keep you up too late and that you have a great day saving lives! <3 <3 <3 you!”

I sighed heavily. One of the many joys of being neighbors with Chloe, the sweetest and most thoughtful of good morning texts. 

“What’s with the mood dude?” Stacie asked. 

The night shift nurse who had been patiently waiting for me lost her patience. 

“She’ll tell you all about that when it’s your turn. She’s mine.”

That brought a smile back to my face as I followed the nurse to take report. 

•••

My patient today was young. My age actually. A 28 year old male admitted last night after an accidental drowning. They were unsure how long he had been down and feared he suffered an anoxic brain injury. I looked over his ventilator settings, my heart heavy with the thought that this young mans brain could be irreversibly damaged from lack of oxygen. 

“Benji...” a choked sob startled me from my thoughts. I turned to see another young man standing in the doorway. He had a hand over his mouth and his eyes welled with tears. 

“You must be Jesse. Benji is your brother?” 

“Yeah.” He manages to say, attempting to compose himself. 

“The doctor spoke to you last night right?”

“Ye..yeah...he said the next 12 to 24 hours are...ummm...we’re cooling him to try and let his brain rest or uh recover?”

“Yup.” I walked him through how we were cooling his brother and what that was doing for his body.

He had a lot of questions that I answered as best I could. 

“What if I had...”

“Jesse...” I interrupted his what if question he kept repeating, drawing his attention back to me. “You did an amazing job last night. I heard how you did CPR. You quite possibly saved your brothers life.”

“I just don’t understand how this happened...he’s a free diver...he can hold his breath for five minutes. We surf practically every day...I only turned my back on him for a minute...” he looked torn. “It could have been longer than that...I was on the phone...I didn’t...”

He started to breakdown and cry. I pulled him into a hug and let him cry on my shoulder. 

“You saved his life.” I whispered. I never liked to give false hope to people. I was practical, but still, I couldn’t help it, from what I heard in report, they had no other family but each other. I’d seen people survive worse.

•••

My day went by great. Benji was stable and his labs and vitals were improving. Stacie told me she saw Chloe’s Instagram announcement and that was the only thing said about it. 

Jesse stayed all day. I made sure the kitchen brought him meals and that he stepped outside for fresh air every now and then, promising I’d call him with any changes. 

“Have you thought about my plan?” Stacie asked casually as we sat and charted outside our patients rooms. 

“Actually...yea...I’m leaning towards yes.” I replied just as casually, knowing the kind of reaction I’d get from Stacie. 

She whirled around in her chair to face me, her face lit up excitedly. 

“Really?! What changed your mind?”

“There are way more pros than cons and really, what have I got here except a mortgage?” I shrugged. 

Stacie’s face faltered a second. 

“I think you should tell her Beca.”

“Right. Tell her what?” I rolled my eyes. “Oh hey Chlo, I know you just got engaged to the love of your life. Your high school sweetheart, and that you’ve been with him longer than we’ve been friends, but I’m in love with you and will you choose me?”

“That sounds perfect.” Stacie replied with a shrug, turning back to the monitor, watching her patients heart rhythm. “I’ve seen you guys together. I’ve seen her with Chicago. There’s no comparison Becs...I don’t get how neither of you have seen it. Dude, I don’t get how Chicago’s missed it.”

“Nah, Chloe’s friendly with everyone. I was just lucky enough to buy the house next door to her.”

“Unlucky.” Stacie whispered. 

I laughed.

“So I vote Hawaii. They gave us a couple different offers ya know.”

I frowned slightly. That would put an ocean between me and Chloe. My heart ached, but I also longed to move on. 

I spun quickly to face her. 

“Luke texted me earlier this week asking if I would be willing to rent a room to him for a while...maybe I can rent him my whole house?”

“Your ex-boyfriend Luke?”

I ignored what she was getting at. I broke his heart 2 years ago. It was only fair to him, I was in love with someone else for the year we were together. 

“It’s been 2 years Stace, he’s moved on...well he did. He and his girlfriend just broke up, which is why he’s looking for a place.”

“He and his killer abs and panty dropping accent just so happened to run to you the moment he’s single again?”

I rolled my eyes. 

“So I saw that offer...wanna room with me or are we making the agency set up separate accommodations for us?”

“I don’t even care Becs, it’s Hawaii!”

“What about Hawaii?” Jesse asked, two coffees in hand. He passed one over the counter to me. “Vanilla latte with half and half.” He smiled shyly at me. 

I accepted the coffee, confused how he knew I loved vanilla breve. 

“Stacie told me.” He blushed, then handed Stacie the other coffee. 

“Thank you so much.” I smiled at him, thankful it was a weekend and management wasn’t here to make us get rid of the drinks. “Let me grab my wallet.” I said, hopping up. 

“No no, it’s the least I can do. Thank you guys so much for all you do. You truly are an amazing nurse Beca.”

I never know how to respond to compliments and things like this. 

Like, how awkward is it to be praised? What do you do when someone compliments you? 

I vented to my dad about that once, when I was a new nurse. His answer was so simple. 

“Say thank you.”

It changed my life and helped pull me easily out of all these awkward moments. 

“Thank you.”

“You’re welcome.” He smiled back at me. “Now what were you guys saying about Hawaii? I live there.”

“You live there.” I deadpanned. 

“Yeah!” He said excitedly. “I have a small place on Kauai. Benji has a place here. We love to surf and can pretty much work remotely anywhere, so we go back and forth...uh depending on our moods..” his excitement had died down and he scratched his head awkwardly. “I sound like a real douche I’m sorry.”

“Are you kidding me??” Stacie interjected excitedly. “You guys are so cool! We’re looking at a few different travel nurse assignments and need to decide which island we want to work on. We interviewed for a couple different hospitals and they made us offers.”

“Travel nursing?” He asked, clearly confused. 

“We’re looking into working for a staffing company. When hospitals are short staffed they’ll hire what’s called contract labor for small periods of time to meet their needs.”

“Ahhhh...that’s really cool! You guys can do that anywhere?”

“No, not anywhere. Well kinda I guess. We had to apply for nursing licenses to work in other states. Our California license is only good here. Our other options right now are Florida or Alaska...really Beca and I just want to travel and get paid to do it.” Stacie winked at him. 

“That’s so cool.” He turned his attention back to me. “I vote Hawaii, and if you have a choice of islands totally come to Kauai. When Benji is better we’d love to be your tour guides.” He smiled widely at me. “Beca do you surf?” He asked suddenly extremely excited. 

“No.” I laughed. 

“Oh my gosh I’ll teach you!” He quickly turned to Stacie. “Both of you if you want!”

“Me and water don’t mix.” I smirked at him as I went to take another sip of coffee. 

“What she means by that is she’s an uncoordinated mess on land, add water and it’s not a pretty picture.” Stacie joked. 

“I like a challenge.” Jesse winked at her. He looked over his shoulder at Benji, easily seen through the clear glass walls. “I’m going to go tell him the plan.” He smiled back at me, then headed in to sit at his brothers bedside again. 

“He’s a sweet guy.” Stacie remarked, getting up to check her patients. 

“Yeah.” I replied, getting up to do the same. 

•••

Stacie and I walked out of the hospital together. 

“Since we’re both off tomorrow, wanna come over and watch something stupid and drink until we make poor choices?” She asked me casually. 

“Ooooo I do.” I smiled at her, pulling out my car keys. “Let me just shower and change and I’ll head over?”

“Perfect. Text me when you’re on your way.”

My watch dinged then. I glanced at it, it was a text from Chloe. 

Chloe: “hey my fav person. I have wine and pizza if you’re up to just vegging out after your long shift?”

“Would uh...would you wanna come over to my place and hang with Chloe too?”

“Beca are you serious? This is unhealthy.” She frowned at me. 

“She’s still my friend.” I pouted. “I can’t just be a dick to her because she doesn’t return my feelings.”

“I disagree.” She held eye contact with me for a brief moment. “But sure!” She said, suddenly turning chipper. “I’ll text you when I’m on my way.” 

“Yeah? Cool. Thanks Stace!”

I quickly texted Chloe back. 

Beca: “you sure know the way to my heart Beale. Stacie’s actually coming over, would you wanna bring all my weaknesses over to my place?”

Chloe: “all your weaknesses?”

Beca: “*kissy wink emoji*”

Chloe: “fine, I’ll bring whiskey too”

Beca: “<3”

I almost typed “marry me?”, but that “joke” probably wouldn’t go over well. 

I drove home both excited for and dreading this evening. 

•••

“Fuck me.” Stacie moaned. 

I raised my brow at her and smirked as I saw cheese fall from her mouth. 

“I told you they make the best pizza!” Chloe said excitedly, handing me a slice, then taking one for herself and plopping down right next to me. 

She held her slice up in front of me. 

“Try a bite.” She whispered.

“I literally have my own slice.” I laughed, and watched her eyes drop to my mouth. 

Fuck, she’s confusing. 

“Bec, open up.” 

“Wha...mmphhh.” I had turned towards Stacie and she shoved her pizza in my mouth. 

“Bite it.” She winked at me, scooting closer. 

“Oh my god seriously fuck me.” I said with a mouthful of pizza. I turned back to Chloe smiling at her. She had a slight frown on her face and had lowered her slice. “You’re right Chlo.” I said somewhat nervously, unsure why she was acting that way. 

Stacie scooted closer and reached over to wipe some sauce off my bottom lip and chin. My eyes grew huge as she brought her thumb to her mouth and sucked off the sauce. 

“I’m a little bummed we’re just now discovering this place when we’re...” 

I coughed loudly and awkwardly, interrupting where she was going with this. I knew what Stacie was doing and I wasn’t going to let her play this game. She could flirt and try to make Chloe jealous all she wanted. That wouldn’t work. BUT I’d tell Chloe about my work plans when the time was right. 

Like when I was in Hawaii and she asked why Luke was living at my place. 

Chloe started patting my back. 

“Are you okay?” She asked, concern evident in her voice. 

I cleared my throat and took a sip of the water she offered me. 

“Yeah, thank you.” I smiled at her. She smiled back, then reached over and wiped something from the side of my mouth with her thumb. 

It felt like slow motion watching her bring her thumb up to her mouth, and it took my all to keep my jaw from dropping as she held eye contact with me and sucked it clean.

Time sped up to normal as she seemed to realize what she did. Her eyes grew and the prettiest blush spread across her cheeks. 

“What movie are we watching?” Stacie asked, clearly annoyed. 

Chloe broke eye contact with me and reached for her bag on the floor. 

“I’ve been really wanting to watch this, but Chicago hasn’t wanted to...it’s totally cool if you guys don’t want to though.” She said shyly, pulling out Incredibles 2. 

“Oh my gosh yes yes yes!” Stacie said, bouncing up and down on my couch in excitement. 

Chloe turned to me, still somewhat shy. “What do you think Becs?”

“Why are you asking me?” I laughed and nudged her with my shoulder. “You know I’ve been dying to see that since they started showing previews years ago.”

A smile slowly spread on her face. “Oh yeah.” She said with a wink, hopping up to put it on. 

My stomach fluttered. She knows I’ve been dying to see this. I even remember her telling Chicago she didn’t want to see it when he tried to take her when it was in theaters. 

Did she plan this?

Chloe settled back onto my couch and somehow snuggled closer to me. Stacie had reclined on the other end of the couch, stretching her legs out. She poked me with her toe and looked from me to Chloe with a “What the fuck?” expression on her face. 

I shrugged the shoulder Chloe wasn’t leaning on. 

“Hey Chloe, I saw your insta post. Congrats girl!” Stacie said excitedly, though her face was neutral as she held eye contact with me. 

“Thanks.” Chloe said kind of unenthusiastically, completely out of character for her. She peaked past me and shot Stacie a small smile. 

“Have you guys set a date yet?”

“Mmm nope.” She mumbled as the previews started. 

“Think it’ll be a long or short engagement? You guys have been together for what, 13 years now?”

Dear god Stacie shut up. I reached over and flicked her foot. 

“Yeah..” Chloe said softly, suddenly stiffening up. “Ummm we haven’t really talked about the wedding yet...” she sat up and repositioned herself so she wasn’t snuggling into me anymore. 

“That’s cool, there’s no rush.” Stacie answered her, happily watching Chloe scoot away. 

I rolled my eyes at her, thankful for her looking out for me while simultaneously pissed she made Chloe too uncomfortable to snuggle with me. 

I mean I get it. 

It’s weird that she snuggles with me right?

Fuck I want her. 

I sighed and sunk down into my couch more, suddenly distracted by my excitement to finally see this movie. 

Chloe brought this for me.

She knew how badly I wanted to see it. 

Damnit, my heart is hers. 

•••

As much as I tried to fight it, I fell asleep. 

I woke up to a gentle shake from Chloe, the credits to the movie were rolling. 

“Sorry.” I whispered. 

“Don’t be.” She whispered back with a smile. “You both had a long day.” She pointed to Stacie, who was passed out, snoring lightly. 

I smiled fondly at her, then looked back at Chloe. 

She had a peculiar expression on her face as she seemed to be studying me closely. 

“Are you two together?” She whispered. 

My eyes grew huge. 

“I’m so sorry if I like third wheeled a date night or something.” She continued quickly. 

I covered her mouth with my hand and laughed quietly. 

“Chill Beale. We’re just friends.”

She snatched my hand off her mouth, but didn’t let it go. “She’s just...” she paused and looked at Stacie again. Stacie was still snoring lightly. She could literally sleep through anything. “You guys seem very...like..” she started to blush. “She’s very flirty and touchy feely with you.”

“So are you.” I smiled at her, and watched her blush even more as I pointedly glanced at our hands. She still didn’t let go. 

“I...do you think she likes you?”

“Nope.” 

“Do you like her?”

“Nope.”

“Is there anyone you do like right now?” 

She looked so nervous and I couldn’t figure out why. I couldn’t let myself think there was hope here. 

“What’s with the interrogation?” I tried to joke with her. 

“You just haven’t dated anyone in a while, and you never talk about dating or anyone you might like...and I’m..I’m curious...” she mumbled. 

I had subtly reached behind me and smacked Stacie’s foot, desperate for her to save me. 

“That’s because there isn’t anyone.” I answered as casually as possible. 

“Is there any potential person...?”

“She’s got a hot surfer dude who’s very interested in getting her into his wetsuit.” Stacie chimed in. 

My jaw dropped and I whipped my head around. I wanted help, but not that kind of help. 

“Oh my god Stacie.” I said mortified. I turned back to face Chloe. “That’s not true.” I said nervously. 

Chloe was quiet, her face unreadable. 

“She’s lying.” I mumbled. That snapped Chloe out of it. 

“Why would she lie about that...why would you?”

“Beca how could you accuse me of lying?!” Stacie exclaimed indignantly. 

I looked at her and rolled my eyes. 

“My patient today’s brother is a surfer and offered to teach me.” I answered, regretting waking Stacie. “I’m not interested in him, he’s just a friendly guy who’s brother almost died...” I ended quietly. 

“Friendly.” Stacie laughed. 

“Okay Stacie.” I replied sarcastically. 

Stacie laughed and hopped up. “On that note, I’m out Becs...see you Monday and we’ll see just how friendly surfer boy is.” She winked at me. “Night Chloe. Congrats again on your engagement.” 

“Drive safe.” Chloe replied quietly. 

Stacie saw herself out and I used that distraction to turn my TV off. 

“I’m seriously not dating anyone Chloe, I would tell you if I was.” I smiled warmly at her. That seemed to warm up her suddenly cold demeanor. 

“Tell me about surfer boy...” she had snagged my hand and pulled me back onto the couch, next to her. 

I rolled my eyes and told her about my young patient who had drowned. How “surfer boy” was his brother and saved him, but we weren’t sure what kind of damage his brother sustained. 

“So you’re his brothers hot nurse...I can see why he’d wanna get you in the water.” Chloe’s teasing voice returned. 

“Not you too...” I mumbled, blushing at her “hot nurse” comment. 

“So you’re not interested in him?” She asked me, catching me off guard again. 

“Nope.” I tried to reply as nonchalantly as possible. 

“Why not?”

I had leaned back and she had scooted super close to me again, distracting me with her perfume. 

“I like...” I bit my lip realizing I was about to tell her I actually liked someone else. 

Her eyes dropped to my lips. 

“You like..?” She hadn’t missed it. 

My heart sped up. 

“No one.” I said breathlessly. My mind had wandered off as I imagined instead saying “you” and closing the distance to taste her lips. 

“No one?” She questioned me breathlessly, leaning in closer. 

My breath caught in my throat. All I had to do was lean in slightly and our lips would meet. 

“Y..you...”

Her eyes moved from my lips to my eyes.

“Me?” She asked sweetly, a small smile on her face. 

“You..” I wanted to kiss her so badly. Her hand moved to my knee, a glint of something caught my eye. Her ring was reflecting in the light. “You’re engaged...” I practically choked out. 

Her face fell and she sat back. I felt like I slapped her. 

I was so confused. 

Was she really about to kiss me?

Why?

We held eye contact for a long moment. Her fingers played with her ring. A determined look took over her face and she twisted the ring off and placed it on my coffee table. 

I watched her, confused, my confusion growing more as she scooted closer again. 

“You like me?” 

Her voice was so quiet, so nervous. 

“Yes...” I whispered. 

“I like you too...” she whispered back, leaning in. Her breath ghosted my lips. 

My mind was gone, my body frozen. This was everything I dreamed of. 

“Can I...can I kiss you?” She whispered. 

“No.” I choked out, my chest tightening as I watched her face fall. 

“Please?” She practically begged me. 

“Chicago...” I whispered.

I watched her eyes tear up and she pulled away from me. 

She looked away and sniffled. 

I sat up and reached over for her ring.

“I don’t want it Beca.” She said angrily, her eyes meeting mine again. 

I grabbed her left hand and slid the ring back on her ring finger. She watched me through watery eyes. 

“Yes.” She whispered. 

My eyes shot up to hers again. 

“You’re marrying Chicago...and I’m...I’m moving to Hawaii with Stacie...” I whispered. 

Chloe’s face went pale. She stood up, grabbed her purse, and walked out. 

I sat frozen, listening to her close my front door quietly. 

“Fuck.” I groaned. 

What did her “yes” mean?


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> All aboard the angst train

I couldn’t drag myself out of bed the next day. 

Chloe didn’t call or text me. 

I didn’t call or text her. 

I spent all day in bed, only getting up to pee. 

I took some Benadryl and knocked out at 9pm, making sure I set my alarm for work tomorrow. 

I just wanted to lose myself in work. 

•••

“Beca what the fuck happened to you?” Stacie asked me as she ran into me in the parking lot. “You look like shit.”

“Ha ha thanks. I’m fine.” I mumbled. 

“What the fuck did Chloe do?”

“Why would you think Chloe did something?” Stacie looked ready to speak but I cut her off. “I can’t do this right now Stace.” We walked in silence for a minute when I suddenly stopped. “You know what?” I said angrily. “I vote Kauai. Let’s reply to them today. Find out when we can start, and put in our notice.”

Stacie eyed me carefully. “Okay.” She smiled at me cautiously. “Let’s do it.”

“Awesome.” I said, then kept walking. “I’m going to learn to surf. And scuba dive. And hike.”

“You don’t know how to hike?” Stacie laughed, easily keeping up with my quickened pace. 

That actually made me laugh. 

“Let’s go camping too.” I beamed at her. 

Her eyebrows shot up. 

“Who the hell are you?”

I laughed again.

“I’m moving on Conrad. And I’m going to do it in style.”

“Bitch I love this, but you and I are talking later tonight.” She said, holding the door for me. 

•••

“Hi Benji, my name is Beca, I’m going to be your nurse today.”

Benji looked up from his phone and turned bright red, stuttering a response.

“Don’t worry this is his norm.” A familiar voice chimed in from a chair under the tv. I looked over to see Jesse smiling at me as he hopped up. “He’s never been able to talk to pretty girls.” He winked at me. 

I smiled awkwardly at him then turned back to Benji. 

“You had a busy day while I was off yesterday.” I beamed at him.

“Yuh..yeah..yes.” He blushed. 

“They warmed him up and pulled the tubes” Jesse beamed at me. “And as far as we can tell the brain damage he has is nothing new.” He winked at Benji, who flipped him off in reply. 

I laughed at them both. 

Today would be good. 

Fuck love. 

Fuck broken hearts. 

Fuck the beautiful gorgeous woman who was marrying someone else. 

Oh god, I would love to fuck her. 

Damnit. 

I refocused. 

Fuck heartache and heartbreak and women who take off their engagement ring and try to kiss you as if it’s suddenly okay. 

Fuck her for getting mad and storming out. 

•••

“I emailed our recruiter. They’re extremely desperate. We can put in our two weeks today.” Stacie whispered to me excitedly, slipping me an envelope later that day. “I wrote your letter of resignation.” She winked at me. 

I opened it and read it over. It was good, very professional. 

“We’re really doing this..” I whispered, my eyes meeting hers again. “I need a new bathing suit.”

“Oh my god we’re going shopping this week!”

•••

Stacie and I left on time that night after exchanging info with Jesse and Benji. Benji had calmed down and opened up to me and was actually a really sweet guy. 

We gave our two weeks notice and I felt a weight leave my shoulders. 

“Chloe told me she likes me...after I told her I liked her..” I said casually as Stacie and I exited the hospital. 

“Wait...why are you set on leaving?”

“Because she’s engaged to Chicago...” I mumbled. After a few more questions I finally caved and told her everything that happened. 

“Beca...it..it didn’t sound like she was choosing him...”

“She tried to cheat on him with me...I will never participate in cheating.”

“Was it cheating?”

“Yes. She’s still engaged to him.”

“But she didn’t want the ring. She said “yes” when you put it on her.”

“I can’t Stace...if she breaks up with him then yeah, but I can’t hang around and wonder “what if”...she hasn’t even texted me since it happened.”

“You told her no and that you were moving to Hawaii with me...the girl she thought you were dating?”

I stopped walking and looked at her, jaw dropped. 

“Becs I’m not saying what you did was wrong. It was actually awesome. But maybe reach out to her...talk this out?”

“Right...okay...I can do that.”

“Good.” Stacie smiled at me and patted my back. “You still have to hike, and surf, and camp, and all that other stuff you promised this morning.”

I punched her playfully then hugged her goodnight. 

•••

Chloe forgot her movie. 

I would text her casually. 

Maybe see if she wanted to finish it?

I drove home, debating what to text her. 

Why the hell would she want to watch the movie with me again? 

We’re in a fight. 

Right?

I pulled up to my house and parked in the driveway, pausing when I glanced towards my front door and saw a figure sitting on my porch steps. 

Guess I wouldn’t have to figure out what to text her. 

Chloe stood as I walked up to her. 

“Hi.” I whispered. 

“I forgot my movie...” she whispered back. 

I broke out into a massive grin and her brows furrowed in confusion. 

“I was literally going to use that as an excuse to text you.” I said casually as I walked past her to open my door. 

I internally hi fived myself. That casual demeanor was such a front. I was a nervous wreck on the inside. 

I opened the door and walked in, leaving my shoes by the entrance. I paused before walking further and glanced at her. 

“Coming?” I asked, my eyes meeting hers as she stood awkwardly in the doorway. 

“Yeah...” she whispered, following me in, pausing to lock my door. 

My stomach fluttered. She locked my door, she wouldn’t be leaving right away. 

I led the way to my living room and took her dvd out of my player, placing it back in its case. 

“Here you go.” I said quietly, handing it over. 

“Did you want to finish it?” She asked nervously. 

“Right now?”

“I mean...if you want? You don’t work tomorrow...” she blushed as I raised an eyebrow in question. She knew my work schedule better than me sometimes. 

“I’d like to shower first...and make something to eat...if that’s okay?” I was nervous too. 

“I’ll make you something while you shower?”

“You don’t have to...I think I have like some cheese or something to snack on.”

She rolled her eyes at me and scoffed. 

“Seriously Beca? For a nurse you really are terrible at caring for yourself.” She ended with a wink then headed to my kitchen. 

I want you to take care of me. 

I watched her walk off, then snapped out of it and headed to shower. 

•••

I was drawn out of my bathroom by the smell of bacon and walked down my stairs in just a robe and a towel on my head. 

Chloe was faintly humming a tune from my kitchen. 

“Pancakes and bacon? What’s the occasion?” I asked, knowing full well that she knew full well that was my favorite meal. 

Chloe jumped slightly and turned to look at me. 

“I didn’t hear you come down.” She said, her voice trailing off as her eyes traveled from mine, down to my chest. I quickly adjusted the robe, realizing it had fallen open slightly. 

Her eyes darted up to mine again, a cute blush on her cheeks. 

“It’s ready.” She said, turning back to the stove, taking the last pancake off.

“It smells amazing.” I had walked up behind her to observe her work, and to steal a piece of bacon, obviously. 

She snagged my hand before I could reach it and pulled my arm around her. I let my other arm mirror it and she melted into me as I hugged her from behind. 

“I’m sorry.” I whispered. 

“You have nothing to be sorry for Beca.” She whispered back. 

I let my cheek press to hers and was briefly distracted by her soft skin. 

“I don’t like how things ended.” I replied. 

“Have we ended?”

My throat tightened and I had to pause as my mouth went dry. 

“I don’t mean...I didn’t mean we ended...”

“I know what you meant.” Chloe said somewhat teasingly as she pulled my arms tighter around her. “Wanna know something?” She asked me, turning her body just enough so she could look me in the eye. 

“All the somethings.” I smiled at her. 

“That was our very first fight.” She said matter of factly. 

“Was it?” I smirked at her, knowing full well it was. 

“I think we handled it very poorly.” She pouted, drawing my eyes to her lips. 

“We?” I couldn’t lose my smirk. 

Her pout turned to a frown as her eyebrows furrowed. 

I hugged her tighter against me and she shimmied so she was fully facing me. 

“I’m sorry for running away.” Her expression had softened as her hands began a gentle pattern up and down my back. 

“I’m sorry for not stopping you.”

“I’m not sorry though...” her eyes held mine. 

I gulped audibly and she broke into a smile, then started to tear up. 

My eyes grew in panic. 

She quickly spun around, out of my arms and grabbed a plate. 

“It’s getting cold, we should eat.” Her voice cracked slightly. 

I stepped back to give her space. She turned to hand me my plate and almost dropped it, her jaw dropping. 

I reached forward and snagged the plate, steadying it. 

“Are you okay?” I asked worriedly. 

Her eyes were slowly making their way down my body. I looked down to see my robe had completely opened and jumped quickly to cover myself. 

“I’m so sorry.” I mumbled, awkwardly trying to close it one handed. 

She stepped forward and helped me close and tie my robe. 

“You’re beautiful.” She whispered, leaning in and leaving a gentle kiss on my cheek, then turned and dished herself up. 

“Want to eat on the couch?” She asked me as if nothing had just happened. 

“Sure.” I whispered and followed her out of my kitchen. “I should probably change though...I actually came down to get my pjs from the dryer.”

She paused and turned, taking my plate for me. “You don’t need to...change...” she whispered, looking me up and down again. I felt my cheeks heat up. 

Holy shit. I definitely needed to change. 

This was dangerous grounds. 

•••

I joined Chloe after slipping on some sweats, a large T-shirt, and combing my hair out.

She handed me my plate when I flopped onto the other end of my couch and eyed me curiously. 

“I don’t bite Becs.” She smirked at me. “Unless the occasion calls for it.” She winked then returned to her meal. 

I blinked at her, then followed her lead and ate my dinner. 

We ate in silence. It wasn’t comfortable silence though. My mind and heart were racing. 

Did she really like me or was she getting cold feet? She’d only ever been with Chicago. Maybe she was curious?

“This isn’t cold feet Beca.” Chloe had turned to face me after we both set our plates on the coffee table. 

My eyes grew. 

Could she read my mind?

She studied me closely and scooted closer. I shifted and sat facing her, my legs crossed. 

She placed a hand on my knee and my whole body buzzed. 

“Do you remember when we met?”

I smiled. Of course I did. My mind flashed back to 4 years ago. 

 

****  
“Do you need help?”

A sweet voice had startled me slightly, but I couldn’t see over or around the big box I was lugging towards my front door. 

“I think I’ve got this alright.” I struggled to say, then almost dropped the box. 

You caught it, helping steady it, and that’s when I saw your eyes for the first time. I blamed my breathlessness on the labor, definitely not on the fact that you quite literally took my breath away. 

“You sure?” You giggled. “Let me help you.”

I blushed. 

“I’m Chloe.” You beamed at me. Your smile was definitely fighting for my favorite thing about you. I couldn’t decide what to look at, your smile or your eyes. 

Your smile grew as you seemed to study me. “This is usually when you tell me your name.” You winked and giggled. 

“Beca.” I practically whispered. I really needed to get control of my heart rate and breathing right now. “I’ve watched too much Law and Order SVU, I don’t know if I should accept your help.” I joked. I could do jokes. 

You let out the cutest dorky laugh, then blushed, embarrassed by your own laugh. 

I laughed in return and we had to drop the box as we both broke into laughter. 

“Usually it’s the husband who did it though right? Not the friendly new neighbor?” You winked at me, reaching forward to shake my hand. I wiped my clammy hand on my jeans, then accepted your handshake. “I live right next door here.” You smiled at me and pointed to your place. 

“Well I have no husband, so you’re still the prime suspect.” I winked. 

She eyed me curiously. 

“Well if I’m going to be the prime suspect I might as well go all in.”

“What?”

“Can I help you move all these boxes in?” She laughed. 

“That would be awesome.” I replied with a deep blush. 

****

 

“I thought it was just a physical attraction. I mean the moment I saw you I, uh...” Chloe paused, blushing. “I wanted you. You were sweaty and your hair was sticking out of your messy bun and kinda plastered to your forehead, and my first thought was how badly I wanted to make you sweaty and your hair messy like that.”

I gulped, ignoring how horribly this was turning me on. 

“I had Chicago, but he was...is always gone, traveling for work...I was confused and thought maybe I was just lonely?” She eyed me, carefully watching my reactions. I did my best to keep a neutral expression. “But then I got to know you...you became my best friend...and it wasn’t just a physical attraction...”

My heart felt like it was going to pound out of my chest. 

“I really couldn’t stay away...I told Chicago about my feelings when you started dating Luke...he basically made me, he could tell I was upset and didn’t understand why I hated Luke...he really liked him.” She shot me a shy smile, then scooted even closer. “Did you ever wonder why I can never keep my hands off of you? Why I always make you snuggle me?”

“Well..” I paused to clear my throat. “I mean yeah, but I loved...I love it.” I whispered, glancing down as her hand moved up my thigh and squeezed. “I just figured you were an overly affectionate person...I mean, you totally are.” I smiled at her. 

“I don’t snuggle and constantly need to touch my other friends...” she whispered. 

“But you constantly link arms with your other girlfriends.”

She rolled her eyes at me.

“Okay...you aren’t as affectionate with them...” I mumbled.

“I talked to Chicago yesterday.”

“You did?” I grew nervous. 

“He encouraged me to...” 

“To what..?” I asked somewhat breathless. 

“To explore this...” She had leaned in close, following me as I leaned back. 

“Th...this?” I stuttered. 

“Beca...can I kiss you?” Her body slid onto mine as I leaned back against a pillow and straightened my legs. She felt so good against me that I got distracted and couldn’t reply. 

She leaned in and brushed her cheek against mine. Her ragged breath tickled my ear. 

“Please?” She whispered, then slowly let her lips brush along my cheek up to my lips. Her lips lingered, barely grazing mine. “Beca...” she whispered breathlessly against me. 

I tilted up and kissed her softly. Her whole body pressed into me more as she returned the kiss. 

It was slow, sweet, and oh so sensual. 

Shit she was a good kisser, and shit, her thigh just slipped between my legs and pressed into me as her mouth opened and her tongue met mine. 

I let out a little moan as I felt her grind into me. 

My hands had been still on her back and suddenly woke up, moving to her butt, squeezing her gently. She broke our kiss with a pant. 

“Beca...” she moaned my name. “I..I want you...” she pulled back, her eyes searching mine. 

My doorbell ringing startled us both. 

She sat up, straddling my thigh. 

It rang again. 

“Forgot to tell my booty call I have company.“ I joked awkwardly.

She frowned at me slightly. 

“It was a joke Chlo...is..” I grew nervous. “Is it Chicago?”

“No...he’s out of town.”

My doorbell rang a couple more times. 

“I should get that.”

She stood and pulled me up and into her, kissing me deeply, only pulling back when my doorbell rang again. 

“I’m gonna get that...” I stumbled away, my legs a little weak from, well, from all of Chloe. 

I looked through the peephole then quickly opened the door. 

“Luke?” 

“Hey Becky.” He smiled at me charmingly. 

I slammed the door in his face. 

“Try again!” I yelled through the door. 

He laughed loudly from the other side. 

“Oy! Beca come on!”

I opened it again. 

“Hey, did you get my text?”

“Nope, I was hanging with a friend, what’s up?” I looked down when I noticed he had a bag at his feet. “Need to stay here tonight?”

“Is that okay?” He asked. 

“Of course. Come on in. The guest room is yours.” I smiled at him and stepped aside. 

“Hi Chloe!” Luke smiled when he saw her. I peaked around him to see she did not look pleased. 

“Hi Luke.” Her eyes dropped to the bag in his hand. 

“How’s it going? Heard you got engaged! Congrats!” He said excitedly, setting his bag down. 

“Everything’s good, thank you.” Her attention turned to me. “I should actually go, walk me home Becs?” 

“I can walk you.” Luke offered. 

“Oh no, that’s fine, you get settled Luke, I’ll be back in a minute.” I smiled at him. 

I followed Chloe outside and across our yards. She opened her door and walked in leaving it wide open, not saying anything. 

I followed nervously, closing the door behind me. She whipped around when she heard it close and walked back towards me. Her face was unreadable. 

“Are you dating him again?” Her voice sounded choked up. 

“No.” I whispered. 

“Do you want to?”

“No.” 

She had backed me up against her door. 

“Good.” She whispered against my lips, then kissed me deeply. I melted into her again. She broke the kiss leaving me breathless. “Does he have to stay with you tonight?” 

“He’s staying for a long time...he’s renting my house while I’m away...”

“You’re really leaving?” Chloe’s eyes teared up. 

“I quit my job and accepted a travel position in Hawaii...Stacie and I leave in three weeks...” I whispered, unable to get my voice to work properly. 

“Why?”

I couldn’t answer her. 

“Why Beca?” Her tone was slightly angry. “Is...were you lying to me about Stacie?”

“Oh my god Chloe!” I was angry now. “Why can’t you believe me when I say I’m not dating or interested in her. There’s no one!”

“No one?” She whispered. 

“No one but you...” I said softly. “That’s why I’m leaving...”

Her eyes welled up and my chest felt like it was being squeezed. 

“Why do you want to leave me?”

“I don’t.” 

“Then why?”

“Because I’m in love with you.” I held eye contact with her. I didn’t whisper it. It had come to this, so I would be bold and tell her the truth. 

She kissed me again, pinning me against the door, quickly sliding her thigh into me. 

I moaned into her kiss as she ground into me, whimpering when her lips moved to my neck.

Her hands slid down my body, she shifted, and suddenly had lifted me up. I followed her lead and wrapped my legs around her. 

Her lips found mine again as she ground into me. 

Our kiss became sloppy as we panted and moaned into each other’s mouths. 

I came embarrassingly quickly from our little bit of friction, with a whimper into a messy kiss. 

God just her kiss had worked me up. 

It truly was embarrassing how much she turned me on. 

She kissed me down from my high. 

“You’re so beautiful.” She whispered against my lips. 

I broke our kiss. 

“Chloe, what do you want from me?“

“I want you...all of you.” She whispered against my lips, kissing me again. 

“Mmmfff...Chloe...” I broke the kiss again. 

“Come to bed with me?”

“I’m not going to sleep with you in your bed you share with your fiancé.” 

“The guest bedroom.” She said, kissing my neck.

“No Chloe.” It came out like a moan as she sucked gently on my neck. “I’m not...not in your house...”

“Well, you just did, in my house.” I could feel her smirk. “I’ll come back over...send Luke here.” She pulled me tight against her, as she held my gaze. “Beca, Chicago is okay with this.”

“You..how? You broke up and he’s suddenly okay with this?”

“No...he knows how I feel about you...he said I can...I can be with you...”

“So you’re still with him? You’re still marrying him?” I asked quietly. 

“Yeah.” She answered me just as quietly. 

I leaned in and kissed her with everything I had, then gently broke it, pushing her away and slipping down. 

“Call me if you change your mind.” I whispered, stepping away from the door so I could open it and leave. My legs were unsteady.

She snagged my wrist. 

“Beca...”

I turned, kissed her once more, softly, and pulled back. 

“Im gonna go check on Luke. I’ll have him drop your movie off tomorrow.”

I couldn’t stop the tears from falling as I made my way back to my house. 

Hawaii couldn’t come soon enough.


End file.
